Why do humans clean their teeth with a gooey brush? Why don't they just eat crunchy treats like us?

Because people like to complicate things. I mean, really, just watch them sometimes. They get dirty and they make this elaborate thing out of getting into a tub full of water or standing in an inside rain thingy, when they could just lick themselves clean. And gross, watch how they handle pooping. They could just do it in a box of sand, but no... They have to make a big deal out of everything, and that include their teeth. And they would like the crunchy treats, but no...they try to grind stuff off their teeth instead.

I say let 'em do it, but dangit, they have to stop trying to inflict that thing on the kitties. Because, doood, that thing tastes awful. I'd rather lick someone else's asterisk than get my teeth brushed.