How did you get your hoomans?

Well...I was born and eventually this young human took me home with her, where I ran around like my asterisk was on fire and jumped and played a lot, and eventually got stuck in a recliner, so she and her roommate had to take me to the emergency vet, which was very very expensive. That kind of made her think a kitten would need more money than she had...

Well, her roommate was friends with the Younger Human, who had been over and played with me and liked me a lot. And she was thinking she really couldn't afford, so he asked the People if maybe they wanted to give me a home.

Well, you know what? The Woman wasn't sure! The Cat Who Came Before Me had gone to the Bridge eight months before, and she didn't think she was ready for another kitty, but the Man was all for it, and then there was this, "well, he might just end up at the pound thing," so the Woman said I could come live with them.

Well, you know what the first thing out of her mouth was when she saw me? "He's beautiful!" I did lots of cute things to make sure she didn't forget it, especially the whole crackhead kitten thing where you run and run and run and then jump on someone and just fall asleep hard, and I became kind of a lap cat, but really only in her lap.

Well, you know, I was supposed to be the Younger Human's kitty, but a few months later the Man found out the USAF wanted him to go to Evil Ohio to pass gas. The Younger Human was in college and was working, and I had kind of attached myself to the Woman, so it was decided that I would go to Evil Ohio with the People and Hank the Dog.

And that's how I got my humans.